{"id":1450,"date":"2009-10-01T09:24:16","date_gmt":"2009-10-01T13:24:16","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/yugflog.com\/?p=1450"},"modified":"2009-10-01T09:30:02","modified_gmt":"2009-10-01T13:30:02","slug":"the-empty-empty-diner","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/yugflog.com\/blog\/2009\/10\/the-empty-empty-diner\/","title":{"rendered":"The Empty Empty Diner"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>&#8220;Sit down, will ya?&#8221; The waitress stood there, silent, and poured hot black coffee into an undersized stained-brown mug in front of me. &#8220;I&#8217;ve seen this all before,&#8221; I said. &#8220;I&#8217;m reading,&#8221; she turned to leave and I asked her to wait a minute. &#8220;What&#8217;s the rush? There&#8217;s no one else in this place.&#8221; She seemed to have no genuine response for this, but her haste conveyed that she had long ago determined that what she had to add to my world didn&#8217;t make up for what I&#8217;d be taking away from her&#8217;s. &#8220;Why the rush, sweetie?&#8221; She walked away to put the coffee pot on its burner. <\/p>\n<p>I drank my coffee and stared out the window at the soft-yellow reflections of streetlights on the wet asphalt. No one had walked by since the bells on the glass door jingled and jangled upon my entrance, yet I&#8217;m not sure it would have mattered if it were mid-day. I&#8217;ve seen it all before &#8211; life spent waiting for something else to come along. Boys would be sitting in the next booth over staring at dream girls &#8211; or just any girls &#8211; walking by outside &#8211; on the other side of the impenetrable pane of glass that obscures their faces and stifles their advances &#8211; their mendacious souls muted. Lame looking businessmen would be behind me talking about something that won&#8217;t matter five minutes later while using their BlackBerry&#8217;s as forks &#8211; nearly, perhaps. Outside, a spent looking mother might walk by in a bright pink sweatsuit. She&#8217;d probably be one of those parents too f****** focused on the outcome to realize that they are cooking their children like little frogs in a frying pan. <\/p>\n<p>I stared at the waitress for a long time as she hunched over the counter seemingly perfecting looking bored and pissed at the same time. I squeezed my coffee mug as hard as I could manage, trying to break it. It didn&#8217;t break. No one pays attention anymore.<\/p>\n<p>&#8220;Excuse me,&#8221; I shouted. Startled, slightly, she looked my way. I waived my menu. She walked over. I could see the imprint left by her bony ass on the red-topped swivel stool.<\/p>\n<p>&#8220;Do you enjoy waiting?&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>&#8220;Not all the time.&#8221; <\/p>\n<p>&#8220;When do you enjoy it?&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>&#8220;When we&#8217;re slammed.&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>&#8220;You like waiting for people to eat and move on? Don&#8217;t you wish you could eat and go sometimes?&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>&#8220;Why are you here? You&#8217;re not going. Why don&#8217;t you eat and go?&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>&#8220;I&#8217;ll eat and then I&#8217;ll go away out there.&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>&#8220;What do you want?&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>&#8220;One egg, dry wheat toast, and a donut. And more coffee.&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>&#8220;Is that it?&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>&#8220;Yes, that&#8217;s it unless you want to sit down.&#8221;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>&#8220;Sit down, will ya?&#8221; The waitress stood there, silent, and poured hot black coffee into an undersized stained-brown mug in front of me. &#8220;I&#8217;ve seen this all before,&#8221; I said. &#8220;I&#8217;m reading,&#8221; she turned to leave and I asked her to wait a minute. &#8220;What&#8217;s the rush? There&#8217;s no one else in this place.&#8221; She [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[26],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-1450","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-writing"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/yugflog.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1450","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/yugflog.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/yugflog.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/yugflog.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/yugflog.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=1450"}],"version-history":[{"count":13,"href":"http:\/\/yugflog.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1450\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":1466,"href":"http:\/\/yugflog.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1450\/revisions\/1466"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/yugflog.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=1450"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/yugflog.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=1450"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/yugflog.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=1450"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}